Think about it....

I have grown and taught in Christian faith to believe that God’s house is built on love, acceptance and forgiveness and everyone is welcome without being judged. However, a recent experience made me realize that this belief is not followed by all and there are some followers of Christ who have their own rules and views of how the house of God i.e. the Church should function.

Let me narrate this point with an example. Some Sundays back, my parents and I attended mass at a Church. The Church usher came to me, few minutes before the mass was about to begin and asked me to do a reading. As I am not comfortable reading in Church, I politely declined. What came as a shock to my parents and me was that she indirectly taunted me on my upbringing for refusing to read. I was stunned because it is these very people who show to the world how holy and peaceful they are at heart, when in reality the devil resides in their mind. This particular usher who knew nothing about my upbringing judged and condemned me because as per her views, I had committed a sin by refusing to take part in the liturgy. And this is just my personal experience, there are many among us who judge, rebuke and talk bad if something is not acceptable as per our mind and views.

Jesus taught us to love, accept and forgive one another for what they are. I don’t remember any of Jesus’ preaching where he tells us to judge or condemn another for their deeds. So why is this message of acceptance without judgment lost among us Christians? Why do we Christians judge another on the basis of how one contributes towards the Church, on one’s upbringing and at times even on one’s dressing and behavior? How can we call ourselves devoted and true Christians when the very basis of Jesus’ message is not followed and practiced among us? If Jesus welcomed and accepted the tax collectors, the woman who was considered a shame to society and even made Judas the betrayer one of his disciple, then why can’t we accept our family, friends or neighbors in the way God sees them? These are question we need to ask ourselves before pointing a finger at another.

I feel sad and disappointed to see that Jesus’ words and preaching have fallen on deaf ears as we no longer practice the virtue of acceptance and forgiveness in our faith. We are all one and equal in the image and likeness of God and he loves and welcomes us all. My sole purpose of this write up is not because I am hurt for being taunted by another Christian. Yes, I am hurt, because while trying to turn ourselves into perfect Christians, we have forgotten what our religion truly stands for – love, acceptance and forgiveness. Think about it.

Arranged Marriage???

Read this book called 'The Immigrant' some time back and its been stuck in my head ever since. Basically the book is about a 30 yr old man and woman having an arranged marriage and their experiences post marriage. Though it brings out the good and bad of an arranged marriage, it somehow gives a very negative idea and even scares those who prefer an arranged marriage. I am all for an arranged marriage where not just two individuals but also two families become one. Such a beautiful thought na...but somehow the book gives a different view. The couple is left on their own to deal with all the problems and adjustments that come their way and the book ends with the possibility of a separation.

I am however not going to give up my idea of an arranged marriage based on this book but yes, this book did raise a few questions I never thought of. Questions regarding trust, adjustment, physical and emotional needs, individual needs etc..which ironically will only be answered once your married ;p I thought about them and realized that all I can hope for is a nice partner and a beautiful relationship where trust and commitment stand as priority. These questions will only add to more confusion and spoil my idea of an arranged marriage. Afterall you don't go looking for perfection or a perfect relationship but try and make an effort to make your relationship perfect na :D

So those like me who hope for a beautiful arranged marriage, don't think too much and just do what you heart says. When the right person comes along, your heart will know.....:D

Going back to my roots....

Dad was listening to his favorite Konkani songs some days back. And mangy that he is...he had them being played on a full volume. The songs however were so catchy that it got me singing and enjoying them as well...Songs like 'Ami Dogi Sezari' and 'Juliana' and many others had me thinking of Mangalore, my hometown and how beautiful it must be now in the rains. It made me miss my cousins and close friends living there and I remembered all the fun times and moments shared with them. A funny different feeling actually. I've grown up listening to these songs but never before did these songs remind me of Mangalore, my cousins or my family. Somehow felt proud.....of my culture, my community and the identity it has given me. It struck me that my culture and my community are a significant aspect of my life. Something which I realized now....after soo many years.

Maybe this is just what I feel or maybe many experience it the way I do...but don't you feel that as you grow up, there's this urge of going back to your roots?? Isn't there a sudden attachment or a feeling of value building up for your community which was never there before?? I feel that now....something which was never there when I was growing up. And I think it's the same with many mangies of and around my age. A lot of youngsters belonging to my community today have no problem studying or working in Mangalore. The trend of going abroad to study or work has been replaced as many youngsters these days prefer Mangalore instead. And not just that, an interest in one's culture and ways, a respect for family and relationships and an appreciation towards our people and community is also generated. Now I find myself waiting to go to Mangalore to meet my family and friends and spend as much as possible time there.

When I was young, I preferred spending my holidays in Mumbai instead of Mangalore. Whereas now, when I soo wana go to my hometown, I can't because of my commitments. Infact my very first post was about how funny and weird my Mangalorean community is. And now, I soo wish I could live and enjoy that fun and weirdness. Funny na :)

I would advice the youngsters and especially those belonging to my community just this - Always value and cherish your community and hometown. It's an important aspect connected to your identity and something that will always be a part of your life forever. 'Dev Bore Karu'.

Choose the one who loves U!

Just finished reading 'Girls of Riyadh'. Intriguing i must say :) In short, it's the story of 4 young girls going through numerous social, romantic, professional and sexual tribulations. The book presents an insight into the complicated lives of these young Saudi women whose amazing stories contrast from the very culture they are brought up in.

Enuff with the summary and let me give you my take on this book. Firstly, I think the book is an interesting read. Well, if a book includes personal and private stories about love and relationship, then it's definitely interesting for any girl my age ;p Plus, it's fun reading how these girls try to justify their love affairs, their boyfriends and even the heartbreaks caused from these very boyfriends. One also gets to see the extent these girls can go to just to please their boyfriends, to have the perfect realtiomshp or to be the perfect girlfriend. This is actualy true with many girls in general na.....girls are willing to lie, make up stupid excuses, totally change themselves and even fall into emotional traps when in LOVE...Why else would they say 'Love is blind' ;p No offence to guys here...I'm sure some guys are totally dedicated when in love. Just that I've heard more of girls giving their all than of guys :)

There's this very interesting thing these 4 girls finally conclude on..i.e. 'All men are made of the same mould. God has just given them different faces so that we can identify one from the other' lol. In short it means men don't change ;p well I personally believe this....not about men incapable of change, but I believe that people don't change. It's is very hard for a person to change and no matter what, a person does not change but remains the same till the very end. Even if they do attempt to change, it would either be to please someone else or to get what they want. And just a little spark is required to trigger off the real self. However, I don't find it necessary for people to change. Since childhood, we are told to love ourselves and accept ourselves for what we are. So where does this funda of change come into the picture?? But somehow, girls take this change ka funda seriously, specially when in love and only a heartbreak opens our eyes to appreciate ourselves for what we are...;p

And finally, there's this one line in the book which is worth thinking about. The line goes...'Choose a person who loves you and the not the one you love'. This I think is true advice and I would advice the same to any person confused about love. I know love is blind, crazy, full of joy, tears, weird feelings etc etc....but the best feeling in a relationship is when you sense the care and concern for you in the eyes of the one you are with :D The feeling that you are speical and important, that what you do or say matters and that there's someone always there for you no matter what cannot be compared to any of the crazy feelings experienced when in love :) And if ever I fall into such a situation where I have to choose, I will choose the person who loves me coz I know for sure that my happiness is guaranteed with that person :D

This book captures my interest becuase it suits my mindset....my views blend with the views the book provides. No wonder I finished reading the book in barely 2 days...;p Newaz I just hope that anyone in a relationship or in love does experience all the beautiful moments with a little bit of hardships, but does not lose oneself in it for a heartbreak to make you realize your true worth...:)

When one door closes, another opens!

I've heard the phrase 'When one door closes, another opens' a thousand times. And every single time that I've heard it, I have always wondered whether it happens for real. Since I am a person who believes in things that I experience for myself, it wasn't until recently that I started believing that this phrase is true. Cannot give details as to which door opened and where, but it's a good feeling and I have been feeling good and positive ever since :)

I eagerly wait for the next day to begin, hoping it's twice as good as the previous one. The things I hate doing seem bearable and there's this willingness to do more. There's this positive feeling and it just keeps getting stronger and stronger. And no failure or sadness can replace it. Ah...life seems soo beautiful! Infact, even right now as I'm writing this post, I'm feeling great and soo full of life. It's like I've got a dose of something which cannot be described. And it's surprising that just one door opened and I'm feeling so wonderful. If I keep looking, I'm sure to find many such doors and I can imagine the joy those doors would shower me with.

It's soo hard expressing these emotions without sharing what the whole experience is about. But there's just one advice I could give here - Don't stop looking because the door you'r looking for is just around the corner. And I can bet on the fact that you wouldn't wanna miss it for anything. Just keep looking and enjoy life...;)

A short birdie story

Life is such an amazing adventure where you come across surprising moments and situations almost every single day. I would like to share one such experience of mine here.

Recently my dad to get rid of his morning boredom as he works during the latter part of the day befriended a male crow. For the crow it was as though an angel was sent from heaven in the form of my dad as his good days had begun. A crow becomes a 'lucky crow' if it's being treated with free unlimited supply of food and in varieties like biscuits, dosas, cakes, fruits etc. Thanks to my dads' generosity, that crow had a new no-food hunting life ahead :) Surprisingly, after a few days, my dads' new friend brought along a companion - a female crow :D Funny coincidence i should say but I guess along with free food, the crow got lucky with love too :) And yes, the birdy couple lived happily together showered by my dads generosity for sure ;p

But the story doesn't end here and the good part and good news comes now. Guessing what followed next in the couples' love-life is a piece of cake. In-case you still need a hint - the couple started twig-hunting ; p Oh yes, our little birdy couple will be proud parents sooonnnnn :) And guess who was most happy knowing about this good news.......my DAD of-course ;p

I have always heard that crows are smart and now I know that it’s true. The smarties have decided to build a nest on the window sill adjacent to one of our bedroom windows. When there’s free food supply close-by, why would anyone go elsewhere….;p The birdies have now also got my whole family involved and excited in looking after their well being. I have also named them Jack and Jill and they are now our adopted pet birds :D

My dad is the most excited though. When he found out about the crows building a nest, the very next morning he brought a bunch of twigs and placed them near my window. And within an hour, all the twigs had disappeared and the nest making was in progress. My mom even kept pieces of cloth for the crows to build a comfy nest. The food supply has doubled, now that my mom and I are involved too in looking after the couple. Every 2 hours we keep a check of the couple and the progress of the nest J They are now a part of our daily routine life. Somehow I have the feeling that the female crow Jill is slightly dominating. Well, there’s nothing new in that since almost all kinds of female species have domination as one of their characteristics ;p I guess Jill wasn’t very happy with the twigs as now bechara Jack is searching for wires and strings. I think they are thinking of building a designer nest and I am eagerly waiting to see how the designer nest will be J

The crows are happy: they have each other, free food supply and soon gonna have a family. But I think the other birdies are not happy with the special treatment showered on the crows. The sparrows and pigeons around are slightly jealous and this I say because today I could actually feel the pigeon giving me a ‘kunnass’ look. And lately, the tiny little sparrows have been trying to get friendly with us chirping and playing around our window. Why do I get the feeling that soon there will be many nests around my window?

This is what I meant by surprising moments and situations of everyday life. Simple things and experiences like these make life so beautiful and fun. Sometimes when I am all confused or lost within the complexities of life, I just watch the crows working on this nest. And watching them makes me happy, all my problems are forgotten and life seems worth living J Jack and Jill are now a part of our everyday life and I am 100% sure that just like me, my parents too are excited watching the couple live their life and are eagerly waiting for the little babies to come. I wish them all the very best ;p

Cricket fever in the air. Beware! You might get it too.....

I can't believe my plans got cancelled today and guess what the reason was??? Indo-Pak cricket match. Somehow I feel that when God was distributing excitement and interest towards the game of cricket, I was either pushed off the line or was definitely sleeping. Coz I just don't have the craze for cricket nor do I understand this craze.

Today's match is so very very important as though the Indo-Pak war is on. I can sense the excitement and the situations I witnessed this week made me realize how crucial cricket is to people. Our class had planed a study tour last week for today. The plan was on and everyone was coming. But as the days came near, it suddenly striked my Professor and some classmates that there's the Indo-Pak match on that day. It wouldn't be hard to guess what happened next or to our study tour plan. Need a hint?? I wouldn't be writing a blog on the influence of cricket on people right now ;p It's been rescheduled for after the World Cup finals.lol. This is just one example, I have a couple more.

As the study tour was one the verge of cancellation, I decided I could meet a friend instead. I called my friend day before asking whether Wednesday would be convenient to meet up. And the immediate reply I got was, 'Don't you know whats on Wednesday?? How could you even think of making a plan??" However, we tried to work it out by meeting up and winding it up early so as to be at home in time for the match. However, last night my friend calls up and tells me, "Arey tomorrow is not a good idea coz I don't want to meet up and hurry home to watch the match. I just want to chill and enjoy it well." Yes, the plan was cancelled!

I reach home today after class just to see my mom watching the match with great enthu. My mom has never been that into cricket to miss her afternoon nap for it. But there she is watching the match right now and updating me about it as well :)

Came online a couple if minutes back and the first thing I notice is everyones idle and busy status. Assuming everyone is doing the same thing i.e. watching the match. A friend then said Hi and the first thing questions I was asked, "Aren't you watching the match?" I replied no and asked back, "Are you?" and the answer was no too. He added, "Thank God there's someone like me!" :)

Its not that I'm not into cricket. Ofcourse I am and I keep myself updated too, just not that crazy about it though. I really want India to win today and play the finals and win the Cup too. But cricket is like worshiped here. Wouldn't be awesome if all problems would be sorted out through cricket matches?? Anyways, I better end now before I come up with even crazier ideas ;p Wishing our Indian cricket team all the very best. GO INDIA GO!